25 Weeks: What I've Learn About Pregnancy


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Here are a few things that I have been surprised to learn while pregnant:

Not all symptoms happen to you. I didn't have sore breast, nausea, or vomiting . While that can be awesome for some people, when you've dealt with infertility an absence of symptoms can be slightly scary.

You can break a pregnancy test if you give it too much pee. Pee in a cup or limit the peeing to 5 seconds. Your test doesn't need all you've got to give.

Sometimes you won't feel pregnant. Especially if you lack the symptoms above. I've only just begun feeling pregnant all the time but I still have a few days where I get out of bed and feel normal - with a bump.

Your breast are pregnant too. They will experience various changes I rather not mention. Just know that blue veins are just the beginning.

You could be out of breath long before you ever show. Shortness of breath and heart palpitations were one of my first signs of pregnancy. It was kind of scary I thought my body was breaking down because it was trying so hard to get pregnant.

I've always thought cravings were an excuse to indulge in bad foods. I've quickly learned that everything including your taste buds change when pregnant, some food is better than none at all. 

That "pregnant glow" is accomplished by a combination of day and night time sweating.

The unwanted advice starts rolling in the minute you pee on the stick. Sift through it or tune it out - do your research but don't let anyone make decisions for you.

Your spouse may or may not experience his own symptoms. You may find it cute or annoying but if he needs more attention show him some grace.

Seeing a nutritionist during pregnancy is helpful especially if you have morning sickness or experience food aversions. It can also be helpful if you are trying to continue a vegan diet or carrying multiples.

People are fascinated by pregnant women. If you get asked dumb questions just try to laugh it off most people are genuinely interested, even men.

Leg cramps are terrifying. Point your toes up towards your knee instead of down when stretching in bed. Also calcium and magnesium comes in handy to help avoid them.

You may have graduated in the top 5% of your class but pregnancy brain can humble you - I promise!

Pregnancy after infertility is just a milestone. Your worry doesn't end there you will have new concerns for your child for 18+ years. So if you're curious, no it never gets easier!

Say goodbye to wine, warm prune juice is now your night cap.

Orgasms are possible in your sleep. Yeah I know this is TMI but before you think you're some type of weirdo know it happens to good Christian folk like me! Lol! They joys of pregnancy.

You'll try your best to be attractive and super graceful. However you should know that a lot happens during pregnancy where "air" is concerned. 

Baby kicks are awesome but the minute they stop kicking you have a whole other reason to panic.

Babies start barging in on your sex life long before they are born. Little kicks may happen at inappropriate times. You can either let them stop the show or put the little munchkin to sleep, if you get my drift.

Ive still got 15 more weeks left of this pregnancy and much more to learn. I thought sharing some of this would be fun and informative for those of you who are in the early days of expecting or still waiting on your miracle. 

How far along? 25 weeks today.

Babies are the size of:  A Cauliflower both babies are weighing in like a singleton. Punchkin is 1lb 8oz and Munchkin is 1lb 12oz. 

Total weight gain: I've requested not to know. I'm eating healthy and believing my body will gain what it needs to feed our babies.

Maternity clothes?  Yes.

Stretch marks?  None.

Sleep: An hour or two between trips to the loo!
  
Exercise: What's that?

Miss Anything:  A full nights sleep.
   
Movement: Yes, constant baby judo and tidal waves. 

Food cravings: strawberries and waffles! Not together.

Anything making you queasy or sick: Not this week.

Belly Button In or Out: In but definitely flattening.

Rings On or Off: On.

Labor Signs: Pesky Braxton Hicks have started.

Happy or Moody most of the time: That depends on if I'm hot, hungry or sleepy.

Looking forward to: Meeting with a doula. Eek!


24 Weeks: Glorious


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Today I am 24 weeks pregnant, it's really baffling that I've got about 4 months left. Even though these little babies are no where near ready to face the world, today marks a huge milestone of viability for their little lives. I haven't thought much about this day because I don't count their viability by worldly standards. Even with all that's been going on I've had faith that God would not bring them out before time.

Last week it really hit me that I am pregnant. In the middle of the night when I was up to tinkle for the one thousandth time I was mesmerized by the peace of the early morning. It was quiet, our house was dark, and my husband was sound asleep. For a moment I felt alone, I was promptly interrupted by a barrage of little kicks - baby judo if you will. A sweet little reminder that the time for quiet nights would be short lived. Our little babies will be here soon.

Even with this belly it's hard to believe I'm pregnant. I have backaches, muscle spasms, headaches, constant hunger and tiredness - but I wouldn't trade this experience for the world. I've been blessed in so many aspects of things I haven't experienced during this pregnancy so I don't really complain about the ones that I have. I'm not able to walk long distances like I used to in the city and I'm finding it hard to jump into my car. I eat more than I really want to and I sleep longer than I'd like but goodness I love this experience. My body amazes me everyday with every single new development. We women are truly fearfully and wonderfully made.

How far along? 24 weeks, just completed 6 months of pregnancy.

Babies are the size of:  Ear of Corn, weighing a little over a pound each.

Total weight gain: I've requested not to know. I'm eating healthy and believing my body will gain what it needs to feed our babies.

Maternity clothes?  Yes.

Stretch marks?  None.

Sleep: An hour or two between trips to the loo!
  
Exercise: What's that?

Miss Anything: Not having headaches daily. Being sharp, I've become forgetful and slower at thinking. So forgive me for any grammatical errors!
   
Movement: Yes, constant baby judo!

Food cravings: strawberries and tacos! Not together.

Anything making you queasy or sick: The smell of chicken makes me gag even now. Apparently my babies are vegan!

Belly Button In or Out: In but definitely flattening.

Rings On or Off: On.

Labor Signs: No thank God!

Happy or Moody most of the time: That depends on if I'm hot, hungry or sleepy.

Looking forward to: Our baby shower, a last celebration before become parents.

23 Weeks: Surrender!


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Since our 21 week drama it's been pretty quiet on the twin front. I can only thank God for that. Even in this requested quietness I am battling my mind for peace. My mind constantly ping pongs with yes my babies are alive and then no they aren't. Almost daily I am rebuking fear, doubt and unbelief. I know that the enemy has set out to steal the joy and the happiness these two littles have brought into my life. He's done just about anything he could think of to try and turn me against God, myself, and others - it didn't work!

God has seemed unusually quiet since we came back to Florida. It wasn't Him, it's just a new season and I am learning a whole new level of trust. Not only am I learning to trust God and surrender my life but I'm now having to learn to trust Him with the lives of my babies. This journey to surrender is deeper than I could have imagined. Next year I'll choose an easier word. Ha!

Since our 16 week scan we've had a rough go at it and a lot of confusion with our perinatologist. One night after much frustration and tears God woke me and told me to tell the doctors what I wanted from them. His voice reasoned that their response to my demands would give me my answer on whether to stay or go. I called them and explained that I wanted the records for the babies switched to accurately reflect who is affected by this condition. I also told them I didn't want any more blood testing, no amino, and no more discussions about termination or selective reduction. I was met with opposition so my answer was clear. It was time for me to move on to a new doctor,  so I did. My new doctor's spirit has reassured me that my prayers for my medical professionals has been heard. God is opening all kinds of doors and placing believers in my path. 

This pregnancy is a faith walk for me. The miracles are similar to that of my IVF journey but somehow I feel a little unsteady in my faith shoes this time around. I know I'm in the midst of a spiritual war because I'm so close to my dreams. The enemy has worked hard to confuse me about the health of my children, managed to make me doubt my abilities to carry this pregnancy, and of all things a battle with doctors for the lives of my sweet babies. God always had the final say and my doctors words were a confirmation as if they had come from the mouth of God himself. She told me "Nothing has changed with what we see on the ultrasounds, but people walk around daily with or without that part of their brains. You and I could be missing ours and we'd never know it! Ultrasound scans are more thorough now and people freak out about the slightest anomaly. The kids look fantastic."

My babies are very healthy we even had a consult with a cardiologist to make sure their hearts were perfect. Everything checked out fine. Our next step is a MRI just to confirm what is not seen on ultrasounds but my doctor says this is just precaution and no reason to worry. So we will do that in about 1-2 weeks.

This journey is not what I expected. Even in spite of a potential diagnosis I am once again enjoying my pregnancy. I pray for these babes every single day, and I am still believing in healing for them. I am grateful for a doctor who says people don't know everything. Again she confirms the fact that God didn't make us all knowing or all seeing.

I still covet your prayers for my pregnancy to be full term and for my babe to be completely healed. There is nothing I can do beyond this point except love and fight for them while surrendering to God.

21 weeks: Painless Contractions


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"Wow my back hurts!" I thought this with every step I took while I was out running errands with my mom on Saturday. I finally let her know I was hot and tired so we ended our day out with a frappucino and a full blast air conditioned ride home. Honestly my back hurts daily but with the stretching of my uterus and a new posture I didn't think much of it.

After getting home I showered and whined to my hubs about needing a backrub. We cuddled, while he rubbed my back. I went to sleep and then woke up to eat, by then my backache was gone. I had tons of energy but decided to lay back down because I had spent a lot of time on my feet. As I laid down I noticed some discomfort around my waist. It almost felt like I had eaten a full meal and my belt was on too tight. I tried to sleep but the weird sensation kept coming. This lasted for several hours before it began to worry me. The discomfort was so obvious - I paced back and forth while googling to figure out what on earth was going on. That's when it hit me. "Maybe I'm having contracfions?!" As I googled no descriptions came close to what I was feeling. I felt like I was being a hypochondriac so I laid down again. I still couldn't sleep, then I noticed my uterus got hard as rock and that never happens without a trigger. So I finally woke my hubby and said I wanted to go to the hospital. I told him what I was feeling and he of course googled for his own peace of mind while I got dressed. I felt bad for waking him because I still wasn't sure exactly what was going on.

When we got to the ER, I told the staff I was having contracfions. They took my info and told me to have seat. I was so annoyed thinking how dare they make me wait when I'm pregnant. They were actually sending for someone to pick me up. When my chariot arrived I was taken to Labor and Delivery. I was put in a private room and hooked up to monitors. The babies and their hearts were monitored as well as my uterus for contractions. They did see that I was having consistent contractions, thankfully not strong enough to dilate my cervix. 

After being tested for a UTI I had an ultrasound to check the babies. A few minutes later a male doctor came in because my OB doesn't have privileges at my local hospital. He asked me to map out my day for him from the time I woke up to the time I came to ER. He listened very carefully and the verdict was in that I hadn't consumed enough water for all that I had been up to on a hot and humid Florida day. He lectured me and made sure my hubby was on his team. Of course two men would agree that a woman needs rest when pregnant to stop her from shopping! I was advised that I couldn't spend tons of time in the blazing sun and that I need to keep walking down to a minimum. I also needed to drink a gallon or more of water per day.

So there you have it folks. I'm not on official bed rest but I have limited my time outdoors. I am taking it easy as the half day in the hospital was absolutely no fun. Thank you for prayers and texts. I am now enjoying a few quiet days during this pregnancy. Thank you God.

Baby Stats:

Baby A also known as Punchkin is 12oz and growing on track.

Baby B known as Munchkin is 13oz and measuring a week ahead.

Both babies kick up a storm and get stronger everyday.

We are enjoying our pregnancy and are not even thinking about what the doctors had to say a few weeks ago.

On another note, we did switch perinatologist and oh my - this one is a keeper. She's a believer and truly showed compassion, love, and grace to me. Our first appointment, the day after my ER stint ended with her giving me a hug and a kiss. I could truly feel God's peace and presence in that visit.

Please continue to pray for us, we feel so blessed and cared for.

20 weeks: A Letter


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My Dearest Babes,

I've never known a love so deep and I suppose it'll only get deeper. Your presence has forever changed the course of my foreseeable life. Now that you are here I cannot imagine life without you, nor would I want to.

When I found out that I was pregnant, I instantly felt a connection that wasn't there before. Your tiny but strong heartbeats allowed me to dream again. I dream of your voices, your smiles, your kisses and coos. I can't believe it's true, I am yours and you are mine. A week later we found out that there were two of you - what an amazing gift from God! There would now be four sweet cheeks to kiss, four little hands to hold, and two sweet bellies to blow raspberries on. How could we be so fortunate?!

Today marks the 20th week in our pregnancy. It's hard to believe that we are half way there to finally meeting you two. I still can't picture what it will be like when I finally get to hold you two in my arms - but I know it'll be a great day. Just a few short months ago I could not fathom what it would be like to carry life in my womb. Now I can't imagine you not being there. I can't remember what it felt like when my womb was empty but I remember the pain I felt in my heart. You've brought fullness and joy with you, even in hard times it can't be taken away. 

Is it clear yet how much I love you? I've never seen your faces but I fight for you. I would even give my life for you. I prayed for you and God answered - I'm finally becoming your mother. You were hand picked for me and you're perfect in every way.

I hope you know just how much I love you.

Always,
Mommy

Update: Baby A or Baby B?!


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Our appointment yesterday did not go as we'd hoped. But we are still feeling great about the growth and overall health of the babies.

After some minor confusion at the doctors office we discovered that the baby that the doctor originally thought was baby A is actually my sweet baby B. Baby A would be the baby that's closest to the cervix and baby B is the one that's furthest away. At my last appointment I thought to mention it to the technician but I figured she was just getting baby A's picture from different angles because she had the wand high on my belly.

Other than not being able to clearly identify if the piece is missing on the brain, baby B is perfectly healthy. S/he is growing has a perfect four chamber heart and all other working organs. This baby is also the most active and can constantly be felt.

My doctor was rushing me to have all these test done. One of them failed due to insufficient fetal DNA in my blood so I have to retake it. She also wants me to do an MRI to take a better look at the baby. After talking it over my husband and I decided that we won't do further testing until our babies have grown larger and when we are comfortable. Our doctor has been trying to let all the results come in before my twenty weeks so we could have an option to terminate the pregnancy if something is seriously wrong.

Because of your prayers and my faith in God I had peace even after the appointment. Our babies mean the world to us and are God's promise to us. The fact that the option is even hanging over our heads seriously offends us. Especially as I have been open with my doctors about how we got here. I'm not trying to make anyone else feel bad about choices they have made or would make in a worst case scenario. I'm usually never one to post about controversial topics but abortion goes against my foundation of beliefs. I could never harm my baby intentionally when I know God created his or her life for a reason. The very fact that I am pregnant today was because God lead me into a fast to end abortion. Also with out clear diagnosis even if my mind were open to the possibility it's not a choice I could make without being sure. In which case there is never any surety until the baby is born.

We've made it clear that we won't be doing anything invasive to disturb the home of the babies. We will continue our pregnancy with confident hope that God in his infinite power and might will heal our baby should anything really need to be healed.

Today I am pregnant. Our babies are alive and growing. They have promise over their lives and we are giving them every benefit to fulfill it. I ask that you continue to pray for us and our babies. That God would continue his workmanship and that they would be whole. Thank you for your prayers so far they mean so much to us!

18 weeks: Join Me!!!


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Today is the day. I've got on my shield of faith and I am armed with the sword of the spirit. Ready for battle because I believe the enemy aims to destroy my joy in this pregnancy. 

These past two weeks of wallowing in the unknown have been hard for me. I've prayed and cried more than I have in my whole life.

Please join me in declaring wholeness, great health and all functioning parts over both my babies - especially our Baby A. 

Please keep us all in your prayers our appointment is at 2pm EST!

He sent out His word and healed them, snatching them from the door of death. Psalm 107:20
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